If I am more ornery than usual,
I apologize blow me. Dunkin Donuts fucked up my coffee order and the heat in the building isn’t working. I can live without heat because I’m rocking a sick CAT vest that will have me sweating by lunch time. My feet are fucking freezing though. It could be the fucking ankle socks I’m wearing, which is my fault for being a cunt-faced gremlin.
The coffee thing is unforgivable though. For those that don’t know, I have a caffeine addiction. A legit, if I don’t get my caffeine by 9 I’m going to get a migraine all day and be miserable, addiction. Every day I go to Dunkin Donuts and get the same thing: Large hazelnut iced coffee, skim milk and 3 Splenda. What the fuck is so hard about making this coffee? I’m going to go through the steps and I don’t even fucking work there:
- Grab large iced coffee cup
- Fill coffee cup with coffee
- Pour a splash of milk
- Rip open 3 bags of Splenda
- Pour said bags in to coffee
- Put flavor in to coffee
- Put on lid
- Give straw
A fucking monkey can do it. So what I got this morning was a large coffee with cream and sugar. I FUCKING HATE CREAM IN MY COFFEE and the issue is that this certain Dunkin Donuts on a certain street (Elliot St) in a certain town (Beverly, MA) continually fucks up my coffee.
[Lebron]So what should I do?[/Lebron] But seriously, what do I do? Do I just suck it up and say “Hey stupid, you fucked up my coffee?” and potentially allow them to spit in it? I think it has happened before, I just don’t think I gave a shit. I’m not accusing anyone of anything, but after seeing the movie Waiting, I refuse to send anything back from anywhere.
At some point, I’m just going to receive my wrongly made coffee and go through the drive through for a second time and throw wrong coffee through the fucking drive-thru, but that would make me the bad guy right? The feeling of euphoria as I throw that ice coffee through the window would be sensational. Seriously, your job is to make fucking coffee.
If my job was to make sandwiches, I’d make the best fucking sandwiches you’ve ever tasted. If my job was to put out fires, I’d fucking put them out. By the “Dunks logic” if these people were fire fighters and your house was on fire, they’d put half of it out and move on to the next house.
I hope the asshole who made my coffee this morning trips and cracks his head open in a puddle of AIDS.
– So the Bruins lost last night. I’m not going to talk much about this game because I was sleeping. The only thing I saw was like the first five minutes, but I couldn’t stay awake. I tried, I really did. Once my head hit the pillow it was all over man. If you’re looking for a recap, here you go. Pizz at Days of Y’Orr has you covered!
– Thomas was awesome last night. I saw some of his saves via highlights. Great stuff. Apparently he still sucks though, right people?
– Marc Savard has a moderate concussion, his second one in ten months. I think it is time for Savard to hang up the skates. I don’t think it is worth him going out there and risking his brain anymore. He clearly wasn’t the same after the first concussion. I hope he is okay and as much as I call him “Scrambled Eggs Savard” I hope he doesn’t pull a Lindros and make a career out of concussions.
– With Savard out of the lineup I would say the upcoming lines will look something like this:
17-46-73, 26-19-18, 28-37-63, 22-11-20
– Horton Watch 2011 is live. 22 days without a goal. Poor bastard. Welcome to Boston.